How many of us parents try to do much to protect our children?  We all try to protect our children, but when do we let them go?  This issue intensifies with a child with a disability.  Cayden does a pretty good job in almost any situation.  But sometimes when it’s a new situation we like him to stay with his brother.  Recently we were at a function that provided childcare and we were just going to keep the boys together.  However, for whatever reason this wasn’t possible and it really hurt me and Lizzy.

Cayden isn’t potty trained or verbal and we were asked to take him somewhere that didn’t provide diaper changing, we would have to leave our function to come get Cayden.  We asked if he could just stay with his brother but it wasn’t allowed.  It probably wouldn’t have been that big of a deal and probably isn’t, the night went well and there weren’t any issues.  But when you want what you think is best for your child and it isn’t allowed it hurts.  We felt we knew where Cayden would fit in better and where he would have more fun.  I almost felt like lying about his age so he could stay with his brother.

Sometimes with Cayden we try to protect him from things we feel he either can’t do or wouldn’t want to do.  In reality we should let him do whatever he wants to a limit.  But the fact is he scares us.  We can’t leave him alone on the playground because first, he doesn’t have fear, and second isn’t always the most stable.  He’ll march up the stairs on the playground grab the opening  and lean out.  Now he hasn’t fallen, but it scares us.  We could say no to playgrounds to protect him, but we’ve learned that we just need to be close by in case he needs us.

We try to protect him from other kids.  Since Cayden can’t talk and likes to “screech” it causes other kids to stare at him.  We usually try to be there to help him say what he wants or what he is trying to do.  ” Bee Bee” is Veggie Tales, which no one else will know until they get to know Cayden.  Some of the signs he does have aren’t the traditional sign which make it hard for others to understand him.

The fact is Cayden knows how to do a lot and we need to let him do a lot.  The hardest thing will be letting him do what he wants and staying out of his way.